The sudden anger. The deer caught in headlights feeling. The frustration. All of the feelings that come flooding in after getting caught up in place that no longer exists.
It puts me in a funk for the rest of the day.
Every single time it always feels like I’m there. It’s always at the kitchen sink. It never fails. It’s been almost 20 years now.
C-PTSD
- Caused by long-term, repeated trauma.
- Typically arises from childhood experiences.
- Often occurs in those who have endured racism and oppression.
- Usually more severe than PTSD.
Although the concept of C-PTSD is longstanding, it is not in the fifth edition of the “Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders” (DSM-5), and therefore isn’t officially recognized by the American Psychiatric Association (APA).
Although C-PTSD comes with its own set of symptoms, some believe the condition is too similar to PTSD (and other trauma-related conditions) to warrant a separate diagnosis.
As a result, the DSM-5 lumps symptoms of C-PTSD together with PTSD. [x]
I have been on every antidepressant known to man and nothing has worked. My [insurance] won’t cover psychotherapy so I’m shit out of luck there. The only thing I know that works is to tell myself to stop it.
Stop it, Lee! Cut that shit out! You’re not there anymore! They can’t hurt you anymore! Stop going back there! Every time you go, you get stuck. The more you get stuck the longer you’re there. Let it go!
It works about 95% of the time. The rest of the time I’m mad for no reason or sad for no reason or upset for no reason or tired for no reason or depressed for no reason or anxious for no reason…
The only time I’m fine is when I’m listening to music. I rely on music so much that when I’m stressed out my brain automatically plays a verse from a random song in my head until it drives me nuts. No matter what I do it only goes away when it’s ready to.
I’m looking forward to having a different perception of life.
The Restless Blogger 